Something as simple as an s...
I received a text from my husband last night (I'm out of town for a work thing). His text broke my heart. It was a screen shot of a comment his mother made, about how she loves all her granddaughters, daughters, grandson...
Grandson. As in one. As in, she only has one grandson. She has two. One adorable little guy here, and one amazing little boy in Heaven.
Forgetting Chandler also means she forgot Paisley. They come together.
Did she mean anything by it? No. But isn't that the point? She so easily left them out. She didn't think anything of it...she didn't think anything of them.
My husband told me how seeing that post broke his heart, made him feel sucker punched, and how he felt like he needed to puke. I asked him if he wanted me to text her and ask her nicely to change it. He said yes. He was too upset to communicate with her directly.
I messaged her and asked, very nicely, if she could simply edit the post to include an "s" at the end of grandson. I didn't say it, but honestly, if she would have done that, all would be forgotten. I'd let go the fact that she left out mine and Dusty's babies. I'd even let her get away with saying it was a slip, that she meant to (even though I'd know it was a lie, I'd still just let it go).
But could she do that? No...she in turn, ignored me, and asked Dusty if he was "really" upset. Like I lied. And then with the best 4 year-old response ever, said she'd delete the comment and never post again.
Fine...whatever.
The point of all this is...as angel parents, we face so many things that just plain hurt us. Intentionally or not, it hurts. People forget our babies. They don't get included in counts of grandbabies, nieces or nephews, cousins, etc. Their lives were so short, people just don't even think about them.
And as angel parents, that is the worse nightmare ever, seeing our babies being left out, being forgotten, being overlooked. The one thing we want is for them to be remembered forever, and when we see it not happen, it is a stab to our hearts.
*disclaimer - I'm writing this with full knowledge that she will likely read this, and that's fine. It's my blog, it's my feelings, I'd tell her to her face if she was sitting here. Is this passive? Sure. Do I care? No. So before anyone criticizes me and says I'm too passive aggressive, I've tried the direct approach with her, it doesn't work, so...if I want to vent on my blog, I will vent on my blog. I'll air my dirty laundry for all to enjoy. Ha!*
Grandson. As in one. As in, she only has one grandson. She has two. One adorable little guy here, and one amazing little boy in Heaven.
Forgetting Chandler also means she forgot Paisley. They come together.
Did she mean anything by it? No. But isn't that the point? She so easily left them out. She didn't think anything of it...she didn't think anything of them.
My husband told me how seeing that post broke his heart, made him feel sucker punched, and how he felt like he needed to puke. I asked him if he wanted me to text her and ask her nicely to change it. He said yes. He was too upset to communicate with her directly.
I messaged her and asked, very nicely, if she could simply edit the post to include an "s" at the end of grandson. I didn't say it, but honestly, if she would have done that, all would be forgotten. I'd let go the fact that she left out mine and Dusty's babies. I'd even let her get away with saying it was a slip, that she meant to (even though I'd know it was a lie, I'd still just let it go).
But could she do that? No...she in turn, ignored me, and asked Dusty if he was "really" upset. Like I lied. And then with the best 4 year-old response ever, said she'd delete the comment and never post again.
Fine...whatever.
The point of all this is...as angel parents, we face so many things that just plain hurt us. Intentionally or not, it hurts. People forget our babies. They don't get included in counts of grandbabies, nieces or nephews, cousins, etc. Their lives were so short, people just don't even think about them.
And as angel parents, that is the worse nightmare ever, seeing our babies being left out, being forgotten, being overlooked. The one thing we want is for them to be remembered forever, and when we see it not happen, it is a stab to our hearts.
*disclaimer - I'm writing this with full knowledge that she will likely read this, and that's fine. It's my blog, it's my feelings, I'd tell her to her face if she was sitting here. Is this passive? Sure. Do I care? No. So before anyone criticizes me and says I'm too passive aggressive, I've tried the direct approach with her, it doesn't work, so...if I want to vent on my blog, I will vent on my blog. I'll air my dirty laundry for all to enjoy. Ha!*
Comments
Post a Comment