So Far...
I have started to update my blog on what I've done so far this pregnancy, but for some reason, I've really struggled. I haven't been able to sit down and make myself write. I think it's leftover anxiety from last pregnancy.
First, pregnancy after loss is nothing short of HARD! I've met several amazing women and watched most of them go through it, and they talked about how hard it was, and I thought, yes, I'm sure it is so hard, but I didn't realize just how hard it is! Every little twinge, every off feeling has me just shy of a panic attack. I had no idea how hard this would be!
That being said, back to what I've done this pregnancy. After learning we were having twins again, I called my OB and expected to be seen pretty quickly to discuss next steps. Well...that didn't happen. It seems like my OB, whom I absolutely love, didn't really have options for me. Since it's twins, a cerclage isn't a great option, and really progesterone injections aren't either. So...as so many women have heard, the first option presented to me over the phone was, we'll start weekly checks around 16 weeks. That was absolutely not good enough for me. No way was I going to do this, wait and see thing, this time! So I asked for a referral to the local MFM (maternal-fetal medicine specialist, or, in other words, high-risk ob). I got the referral and the local high-risk ob set up my appointment...for 15 weeks. Again, not good enough.
Besides my appointment being so far away, I also wanted a second opinion to discuss different options, so I did a google search, and found an MFM in Tulsa, OK, which is a couple of hours from here. I called, explained my situation/history to the person who made the appointment, and she said I'd need to come over for a nurse's interview, and actually got me in within a couple of weeks. I was pretty excited about this! I was ready to get a game plan!
In the meantime, I found out a girl from my high school who also lost twins last year was pregnant again, with a singleton, and also lives in Tulsa. My mom talked to her mom and got the name of the high-risk ob she was seeing, so I made an appointment with that doctor too! Couldn't have too many opinions, right?
The day came for our MFM appointment in Tulsa, and boy, was that weird! Apparently, it was more of a walk-in clinic (with an MFM???). The questionnaire I had to fill out asked things like, was I happy about the pregnancy, did the baby's dad know about the pregnancy, was he happy about it, and on and on. I looked at Dust and apologized and said I had no idea what I had gotten us into!
Anyway, it ended up being a long and rather funny story, that hopefully I will blog about so I don't forget, but, at the end of the day, we figured out that office was not the place for us. There was basically a huge mix-up and I was set up as a new ob patient, rather than a patient coming over for a consult with the MFM. The next week, the MFM actually called me herself and apologized several times about it! I talked to her on the phone and asked her what she could do for my pregnancy. I didn't get much of an answer.
The thing with twins after twin loss is, there just isn't much out there. There aren't a ton of things that can be done that have been shown to really help. However; I had been doing my research as well, and knew there was a device called an arabin pessary, which has been used in Europe (developed by a German doctor), and has been shown to have success in twin pregnancies. I asked the doctor about it, and she'd never heard of that, but said she'd look into it, and also said she'd discuss with the other MFM that I had an appointment with in a couple of weeks. A few days passed, and she emailed me and said she couldn't find a way to get the pessary in, and that the other MFM (a friend and colleague of hers), had no experience with it either.
Well, that pretty much settled it for me. By this time, I'd met a girl online through another online friend who lost her sweet twins last year, and had recently had a successful subsequent twin pregnancy and had 2 month old twins at home. I found her, and we began emailing and texting back and forth. I learned that she saw a doctor in Kansas City, and that doctor did the pessary for her, and has lots of experience with it. So, at that point, I decided that was the doctor I needed to see. We didn't care about the 3.5 hour drive to KC, or however many subsequent trips it would take.
I truly believe that God orchestrated the connecting of me to my friend Nickie. She has been so helpful, sharing tips and things that got her through her pregnancy and such. And the comfort I feel knowing I am being seen by her doctor helps so much. Now, I say all of this and know that every single person and every single pregnancy is different, but, I also say this knowing that God has a plan, whatever it is, and has led me to this doctor and this friend!
I called the office in Kansas City to ask about coming up for a consult. I explained my situation and history, and they set me up with an appointment the following week! That was awesome! I couldn't wait!
Dusty and I headed up to KC on October 16th, just over a month after learning we were expecting twins again. We had an ultrasound and got to see our sweet babies, and then had a consult with a resident and the doctor and it was amazing! The resident remarked about how educated we were about the options, and left the room to get the doctor to finish up the consult. When the doctor walked in, she was funny, as she said, I've been hearing a lot of buzz about you! Not sure what that meant, but we found it funny! We concluded the consult with a follow up appointment to have the pessary place, yay!
I'll blog more about the pessary. Please keep us in your prayers, especially over the next 6-8 weeks, as we are really entering the critical time of the pregnancy, and quickly approaching the point where we lost Chandler and Paisley. Thanks so much!!
First, pregnancy after loss is nothing short of HARD! I've met several amazing women and watched most of them go through it, and they talked about how hard it was, and I thought, yes, I'm sure it is so hard, but I didn't realize just how hard it is! Every little twinge, every off feeling has me just shy of a panic attack. I had no idea how hard this would be!
That being said, back to what I've done this pregnancy. After learning we were having twins again, I called my OB and expected to be seen pretty quickly to discuss next steps. Well...that didn't happen. It seems like my OB, whom I absolutely love, didn't really have options for me. Since it's twins, a cerclage isn't a great option, and really progesterone injections aren't either. So...as so many women have heard, the first option presented to me over the phone was, we'll start weekly checks around 16 weeks. That was absolutely not good enough for me. No way was I going to do this, wait and see thing, this time! So I asked for a referral to the local MFM (maternal-fetal medicine specialist, or, in other words, high-risk ob). I got the referral and the local high-risk ob set up my appointment...for 15 weeks. Again, not good enough.
Besides my appointment being so far away, I also wanted a second opinion to discuss different options, so I did a google search, and found an MFM in Tulsa, OK, which is a couple of hours from here. I called, explained my situation/history to the person who made the appointment, and she said I'd need to come over for a nurse's interview, and actually got me in within a couple of weeks. I was pretty excited about this! I was ready to get a game plan!
In the meantime, I found out a girl from my high school who also lost twins last year was pregnant again, with a singleton, and also lives in Tulsa. My mom talked to her mom and got the name of the high-risk ob she was seeing, so I made an appointment with that doctor too! Couldn't have too many opinions, right?
The day came for our MFM appointment in Tulsa, and boy, was that weird! Apparently, it was more of a walk-in clinic (with an MFM???). The questionnaire I had to fill out asked things like, was I happy about the pregnancy, did the baby's dad know about the pregnancy, was he happy about it, and on and on. I looked at Dust and apologized and said I had no idea what I had gotten us into!
Anyway, it ended up being a long and rather funny story, that hopefully I will blog about so I don't forget, but, at the end of the day, we figured out that office was not the place for us. There was basically a huge mix-up and I was set up as a new ob patient, rather than a patient coming over for a consult with the MFM. The next week, the MFM actually called me herself and apologized several times about it! I talked to her on the phone and asked her what she could do for my pregnancy. I didn't get much of an answer.
The thing with twins after twin loss is, there just isn't much out there. There aren't a ton of things that can be done that have been shown to really help. However; I had been doing my research as well, and knew there was a device called an arabin pessary, which has been used in Europe (developed by a German doctor), and has been shown to have success in twin pregnancies. I asked the doctor about it, and she'd never heard of that, but said she'd look into it, and also said she'd discuss with the other MFM that I had an appointment with in a couple of weeks. A few days passed, and she emailed me and said she couldn't find a way to get the pessary in, and that the other MFM (a friend and colleague of hers), had no experience with it either.
Well, that pretty much settled it for me. By this time, I'd met a girl online through another online friend who lost her sweet twins last year, and had recently had a successful subsequent twin pregnancy and had 2 month old twins at home. I found her, and we began emailing and texting back and forth. I learned that she saw a doctor in Kansas City, and that doctor did the pessary for her, and has lots of experience with it. So, at that point, I decided that was the doctor I needed to see. We didn't care about the 3.5 hour drive to KC, or however many subsequent trips it would take.
I truly believe that God orchestrated the connecting of me to my friend Nickie. She has been so helpful, sharing tips and things that got her through her pregnancy and such. And the comfort I feel knowing I am being seen by her doctor helps so much. Now, I say all of this and know that every single person and every single pregnancy is different, but, I also say this knowing that God has a plan, whatever it is, and has led me to this doctor and this friend!
I called the office in Kansas City to ask about coming up for a consult. I explained my situation and history, and they set me up with an appointment the following week! That was awesome! I couldn't wait!
Dusty and I headed up to KC on October 16th, just over a month after learning we were expecting twins again. We had an ultrasound and got to see our sweet babies, and then had a consult with a resident and the doctor and it was amazing! The resident remarked about how educated we were about the options, and left the room to get the doctor to finish up the consult. When the doctor walked in, she was funny, as she said, I've been hearing a lot of buzz about you! Not sure what that meant, but we found it funny! We concluded the consult with a follow up appointment to have the pessary place, yay!
I'll blog more about the pessary. Please keep us in your prayers, especially over the next 6-8 weeks, as we are really entering the critical time of the pregnancy, and quickly approaching the point where we lost Chandler and Paisley. Thanks so much!!
Crazy journey!! Whew! Hang in there and praying for you!
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