What You Both Gave Us

Our sweet children, Chandler and Paisley.  We love you so very much.  Thank you for all of the things you gave us.  Nothing will ever take these things away.

You Gave Us...

The titles of Mom and Dad.  Although we never got to hear your sweet little voices say that to us, because of the two of you, we are now parents, to the sweetest, most beautiful angels.

A pregnancy announcement.  And what a joy it was.  We loved spending a Saturday morning with our friend Chris, posing for pictures we never thought we'd take, carrying around a frame with the sweet onesies from our friend Liz, that we wish you could have worn.  There were many days when we didn't know if we would ever have a reason to take those pictures, and you, our loves, gave us that reason.

A gender reveal party that we shared with our family.  We still have the video where I can hear my sweet mother's voice say with such excitement, "One boy and one girl!"  We had so much fun planning that party for you both.  Because of an "oops" by the ultrasound tech at the emergency room, we knew what you both were, and although originally, we didn't plan on knowing until we opened the boxes containing the balloons, we were so thrilled to know, and so happy we were having a boy and girl.  It was our little secret for 9 days, and we loved it!  It was so much fun to tell everybody after the reveal what your names were.  Summer asked me before the reveal what your names were, and then realized that would give it away.  We had quite the laugh about that. 

A reason to pin baby things on a baby board on Pinterest that wasn't titled "Someday" and instead, was titled "Finally!!  Baby times 2!!".

A nursery to paint, twice!  I planned to tell the story on here once the nursery was finished.  We picked out a gray colored paint, and while I was away in Las Vegas for work, Dusty painted the nursery the color we picked out.  I came home, and walked in, so excited to see it, but when I did, I couldn't hide my disappointment as it was just too blue.  It was pretty, but it was blue.  We waited and looked again in the morning, hoping it would be more gray in natural light, but we knew better, and in the morning, it was still blue.  Your sweet daddy was out of work at the time, and did such a great job on it, that I hated telling him I wanted it repainted.  We thought maybe once we got the cribs in the nursery, it would look more gray.  It didn't...it only became bluer.  I knew that just wouldn't do for our sweet Paisley, although I'm sure our tough Chandler would have preferred it!  So...we ended up painting it the same gray color as the office right across the hallway!  But, not until after we removed all the tape, put back all the outlet covers, and set up the cribs.  That's ok though, we'd tape and paint that room a million times if it meant getting it perfect for the two of you!

The chance to go to Target and pick out baby things.  For the first time in years, we walked into the baby section without a pain deep inside.  Instead, we were overjoyed.

The joy of shopping for the perfect coordinating boy and girl outfits.  We bought you, Chandler, this perfect, knit blue romper, with a cute pattern across the chest.  It was navy blue, with a gray pattern.  With it, we found the cutest little beret for you to cover your head with.  For you, Paisley, we bought the cutest little navy blue lace dress, with tights, and sparkly blue shoes.  The dress was sleeveless though, and at Carter's, we just assumed they were out of the newborn size gray cardigans they had hanging with your dress.  We thought we'd just order it online when we got home.  Of course, as soon as we got home, we looked it up to discover it started at size 3 months.  I asked your grandma to be on the look out for a gray cardigan for you.  She told me last Friday that she looked and looked for one, but hadn't found one yet.  We would have found one for you. 

The thrill of having a baby shower.  My co-workers threw us a baby shower on October 4th and what a shower it was.  We had the cutest cakes, which were made to look like baby butts, with your names on them.  We received the most amazing gifts.  My co-workers were so thrilled for me to finally be pregnant, and you could feel the love from them all at the shower.  They were so anxious to meet you.  We even played a game where we guessed what date you would arrive, and those calendars were hung up in each of my offices in the break room, waiting to see who would win. 

Your grandma a reason to give me the outfits that my brothers and nephews, myself and Summer all had our pictures taken in at 6 months old.  For you, Chandler, it's an adorable little blue checked outfit, and for you, Paisley, it's a blue dress with lace trim.  Your grandma brought these to my work shower and surprised us with them.  We talked about how happy we were that we get to have pictures with both outfits and how we didn't have to wonder any more about which outfit we'd need, we needed both!!

Happiness.  Chandler and Paisley, for the first time in a very long time, you gave us happiness.  We can't even describe the joy you gave us.  I'm not sure we'll ever be as happy as we were when we knew the two of you were growing inside of me.  I shared your picture with a coworker, and as I did, I said how badly we wanted the two of you.  She said, we all did, and then she said, those babies brought so much happiness in their short time.  It touched me so much to hear her say that to me.  You brought happiness not only to your family, but to others that knew you. 

A reason to live.  When infertility seemed to have beaten us down until we could take it no more, you both were that second line on the pregnancy test, and with that, we now had so much to live for. 

And now, our sweet babies, you have given us an even greater desire to go to Heaven and be reunited with you, our precious angels.  We love you more than we can even describe.

Comments

  1. Still thinking and praying for you. I liked this post, to know how much joy they brought you is priceless.

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